"You are now property of Anime Academy"

In case you're wondering, I got the idea for this entry's title from "You are now property of the Department of Defense" of Hoo-ah, an account of... just go read it. I'm not about to summarize it, but it's a very good collection of stories. You won't be disappointed.

Written October 23rd, 2004

January 11th, 2004 - Dear student body,
Please give a warm welcome to our newest addition to the Anime Academy Staff: Ender, Professor of Anime Storytelling. With fifteen years of studying anime, Ender brings his many years of expertise to the faculty. Enroll in his classes today!

In case you're too lazy to do the math, it's been more than 10 months since the previous professorship contest. The way that Anime Academy works is it has a staff that contributes to the site; it's not a THEM Anime Reviews or AnimeNfo.Com where any random joker can submit a review when they haven't even watched all of an anime or their sole purpose is to pan a series and nothing more. We take pride in the fact that we strive for honesty, dedication, and integrity, and to do so, we have a staff that has been selected to be a part of Anime Academy because they display qualities that we uphold (or if you want a more romantic version, they were forged in Perdition's flames and came out as Professors!).

We usually have contests every 6 months, but for reasons I don't know (I haven't exactly pressed Kain for an answer; he's in charge, and while it's part of my personality to be aggressively curious, that doesn't mean I shouldn't trust his judgment), there hasn't been one. However, talking with Mugs recently revealed that we might be having a professorship contest in the near future, but I don't determine such things when it comes to Anime Academy. But with a possibility of one happening in the near future, I have decided to write an entry outlining tips on how to deal with the application, a copy of what the previous application looked like, as well as a copy of the application that I e-mailed to become a professor. Be warned: following these tips and my example will not guarantee that you will become a professor, but they will improve your chances.

General tips:

• You don't have to be the best writer. Proper grammar and spelling is always nice, but we value who you are over what you can do. For example, we would like to have a kind, humble staffer who can write average reviews rather than a moody, deceiving staffer who writes excellent reviews (then again, quality in reviewing is subjective).
• Have someone proofread your application before you turn it in. Letting it sit for a few days and picking it back up does not guarantee that you will be able to spot all of the grammatical mistakes. You know what you're trying to say when you write, but other people don't, hence they can spot mistakes much easier.
• Turn in your application at least a few days before the deadline. This will help two people: yourself (so you aren't rushed) and Kain (so he isn't flooded with applications at the very last minute).
• We look for and want honesty. When you're filling out the questionnaire, tell it how it is. If you weren't a part of a fansub group or a site dedicated towards a specific anime, don't lie and say "I did blah blah blah for blah fansub group" or "I love blah blah, so I made a website detailing it".
• When you're writing your review for your application, be honest. If you think that Neon Genesis Evangelion is worth a 100% or a 15%, explain why by using your opinion and facts about the series. We don't want a rehash of reviews already available in the Library. Don't be scared that someone may disagree with your opinion. There is no way to please everyone, and if you become a professor, you job isn't to please everyone (for example, I was honest, gave Saikano a 68%, then proceeded to get shit for it because not everyone agreed with that, but I could have cared less).
• If you blow off your doubts, you won't worry about the outcome, thus you can focus on putting everything you have into it. You're being judged by who you are, so let us know what's going on in your head (i.e. personality, thoughts, opinions, et la).
• If you include your name with your application, that's grounds for immediate disqualification. There is no spot on the application for a name, so don't include it. Likewise, there is no spot for how much anime you own, political affiliation, gender, sexual orientation, or favorite type of peanut butter. Why do we do this? We want to eliminate as much bias as possible.
• Burn your bridges behind you so you can only go forward. By this, I mean that if you're already working for another reviewing or a general anime site, why are you ditching them for Anime Academy? Dedication is a key part of being an Anime Academy professor. If you're ditching someone else for us, what's the chance that you're going to ditch us for something bigger and better? This part speaks volumes about one's character.
• For the review, try to keep it similar to Anime Academy reviews; a few sentences for the summary, 250-500 words for the review, and brief remarks for the highs and lows. For the questionnaire, there is no set limit, so take your time answer the questions as best as you can; however, this is not an invitation to be overly wordy and drag it out. We want to see meat, not fat. Also, if you want to be funny, be funny because that'll get you a few brownie points, but don't lose track of what the application's purpose is.
• Last piece of advice: review an anime that isn't spectacular or trash. Like Kain has said before, it's easy to throw praise or stones at an anime. Half of the application is a review, and it's easier to see how well you review if you choose an anime that you think is more "middle of the road". Need a suggestion? Don't ask me for any; you should be able to think of a few yourself. Besides, it's your opinion.

Okay, so after reading all of that, you probably know how to take on the application... but you don't have an application at the moment, so reading those tips was a waste of your time because there isn't a contest going on. But wait! Here's a copy of the application:

Anime Academy Professorship Application

Part I: Sample Review

Title:
Genre:
Company:
Format:
Summary:
Grade:
Highs:
Lows:
Review:

Part II: Questionnaire

#1. In a small paragraph, detail your anime history, including how you were first introduced to anime and your recent involvement. Mention any projects such as websites, fan subbing or employment.

#2. In a small paragraph, detail what anime means to you and how much of your life is consumed by anime and/or Japanese culture.

#3. What genre of anime is your favorite? Why?

#4. How were you introduced to the Anime Academy? How have you enjoyed the community and campus life thus far?

#5. There are plenty of anime review sites out there. Why are you applying to the Anime Academy?

#6. Do you enjoy writing? Why?

#7. Can you devote yourself enough to the Anime Academy cause to submit at a minimum two reviews every calendar month on a consistent basis?

#8. Please include any comments that you feel may help us better know you or why you should be hired as a Professor.

Lastly, because I'm a nice guy and I'm sure that not everyone still knows how to go about the application, here's a copy of my application. Note how I used the same tips that I listed before, but do not copy exactly what I wrote; trust me, I'll see the final group of applications, and if I find sentences that use the same words or general meaning that I conveyed, I'll pick up on that and get really pissed off.

Anime Academy Professorship Application

Part I: Sample Review

Title: Armored Trooper Votoms, a.k.a. Soukou Kihyou Votoms
Genre: Action
Company: Sunrise
Format: 52 episodes
Summary: A century of open warfare between the rival powers of Balarant and Gilgamesh has destroyed nearly 200 worlds. Now, a cease-fire has settled across the Astragius Galaxy. Chirico Cuvie, a member of Gilgamesh's elite Red Shoulder battalion, is transferred to a new unit for a secret mission. While on the mission, Chirico finds a mysterious and beautiful woman, but is left behind to die in space by his new unit. Who was the woman? Why did his own unit try to kill him? What was the purpose of their mission? As he wonders about these questions, Chirico begins his private war to find the answers.
Grade: 82%
Highs: Great atmosphere; non-stop development; excellent combat sequences
Lows: Forced romance; mediocre seiyuu cast
Review: When you watch a series that is almost as old as you are, there is a dull respect that you normally do not give most anime right off the bat. Armored Trooper Votoms may be a bit rough around the edges, but rest assured, this is a classic anime that is on par with Macross.

Coming from Takahashi Ryousuke, many similarities can be seen between this and some of his latest works, which include Gasaraki and Blue Gender. Despite dated art and animation, it all works very well towards creating the right atmosphere. All of the grit and grime of this futuristic universe can be seen and felt through the art style, and I admit that this helped the series greatly. Spanning 52 episodes, everything is evenly spaced out across four arcs, and with exception for three recap episodes, the entire series lacks any sort of filler, keeping the plot and character development rolling along constantly. Even newer series that are 26 episodes in length seem to be unable to keep everything paced well and are forced to use filler. However, where Armored Trooper Votoms really shines is with its rife and great combat scenes. If you were looking to see old school mecha battles at their prime, your search has ended.

However, even classic anime have their occasional weak spots. The romance between Chirico and Fyana feels forced all of the time: not only do we have two people who suddenly fall in love for little or no reason, but also they are not really compatible at all. Both characters are cold, almost inhuman at times, and neither one really possesses an innate yearning to find love. Despite having a great atmosphere, what prevents Armored Trooper Votoms from having an authentic atmosphere is the fact that the seiyuu cast is, for the most part, bland. At many instances, the acting was just bad, whether these parts were too wooden or overacted.

After watching Armored Trooper Votoms, it is very easy to understand why there are "jaded otaku." You will not find a quality anime saga quite like this being created these days, and it goes to show that there are series that are oldies but still goldies.

Part II: Questionnaire

#1. In a small paragraph, detail your anime history, including how you were first introduced to anime and your recent involvement. Mention any projects such as websites, fan subbing or employment.
I could say that anime has been a part of most of my life, but that would be dishonest. I can remember watching anime as a child and even up through high school, but I never actively pursued it like I do now. If you want a number, I would say that my anime history is two years old, beginning back after I graduated from high school. I have not been actively or inactively involved in the creation of any websites, fan subbing or dubbing, or any employment involving anime.

#2. In a small paragraph, detail what anime means to you and how much of your life is consumed by anime and/or Japanese culture.
To me, anime is a versatile form of animated art of Asian origin. Rarely will you find any Western-made cartoons depicting even some of the vast array of themes taken on by anime, but this mainly comes from a “cartoons are for children” stereotype held by mainstream Western cultures. Anyways, I would say that a healthy portion of my bank account goes towards anime, usually in the form of DVDs. As far as my life being consumed by Japanese culture, I would say that I have a good understanding of Japanese culture as a whole and that I choose to not have my life consumed by it. However, I am taking a Japanese language class come Fall semester of 2003 at University of Pittsburgh in order to gain a better understanding of Japanese culture and language.

#3. What genre of anime is your favorite? Why?
I have no particularly favorite genre. I have seen plenty of good and bad anime in every genre that I feel that no particular genre is better than another, nor do I favor one over another simply because it is all anime. I feel that each anime should be judged based upon its own merits rather than because it fits a certain mold.

#4. How were you introduced to the Anime Academy? How have you enjoyed the community and campus life thus far?
Back in October of 2002, I sort of stumbled upon Anime Academy from out of nowhere. I forget the exact why’s and how’s, but I think what pulled me into Anime Academy was the fair, accurate, and lightly comical reviewing as well as the atmosphere created by everything. As well, I would say that I have thoroughly enjoyed being apart of Anime Academy, in both the Lounge and the IRC channel. The Lounge is particularly more engaging in both mentality and actual content, with exception for the occasional pointless thread. The IRC channel itself is a good place to kick back, chill out, and talk about nearly anything with other staff and students of Anime Academy, but the atmosphere is entirely different.

#5. There are plenty of anime review sites out there. Why are you applying to the Anime Academy?
I have seen many sites that review anime, and while I have found a few sites that give mediocre reviews, the vast majority of them are poor. Anime Academy seems to have a certain blend of wit and intelligence while taking itself seriously without losing track of what its objectives are. I would like to be apart of that and add onto it.

#6. Do you enjoy writing? Why?
Yes, I do enjoy writing quite a lot. In all honesty, my main problem whenever I do write something that is rather long, I have a problem wrapping it all together and creating a good ending. However, if it is short, there is no problem, and although I want to be able to properly write longer compositions, I do realize that I am better at keeping things short and concise. By longer, I mean more than twenty pages. A more direct answer to the “Why” is a bit deeper than that. I have a stutter, which means that I have difficulty verbally expressing myself, therefore, I try to make up for it with a written expression of myself. When I speak, my stutter holds me back; when I write, only my imagination is able to hold me back.

#7. Can you devote yourself enough to the Anime Academy cause to submit at a minimum two reviews every calendar month on a consistent basis?
Yes, I would be able to submit a minimum of two reviews every month were I to be accepted as a professor. However, please note that were I to be accepted as a professor, I would not be able to put forth a lot of time beyond those two reviews for the summer months because of my work schedule, but I would have a lot more time once I get back to college in the Fall.

#8. Please include any comments that you feel may help us better know you or why you should be hired as a Professor.
Given more questions and more space, I am quite positive I would be able to thoroughly answer any other questions as part of the application process.

If you wish to read through some of my online writings and thoughts to get a better feel for who I am and how well I write, here is the site:
http://www.improvisation.ws/mb/showthread.php?s=&threadid=11345

If this application is unreadable, here are other means to view my application:
http://www.pitt.edu/~eaj11/aapa.doc
http://www.pitt.edu/~eaj11/aapa.txt

Thank you for your time.

Now since the purpose of this entry isn't necessarily for reflection, I'll say "fuck it" and reflect away. My Armored Trooper Votoms is so old that I wish I could update it. Seriously, my writing style has gradually evolved because I write a lot for Anime Academy. I see it as an old review of mine that shifts too hard between points, but other than that, there's nothing really wrong with it. I just wish I could rewrite it a bit so the transitions aren't as sudden. And as far as the last question for the questionnaire, the first link is to my old blog (which turned into this blog) and the other two Pitt links are dead. Anyways, after reading my application again, I can see why I was chosen to become a professor (particularly my answer to #6).

With regards for the professorship contest, I've just given you the tools to write up a helluva application. However, it's up to you to use those tools properly. And don't think "if I follow everything that he said, I'll become a professor" because that isn't the case. What I've done will definitely help you, but it won't guarantee that you will come out on top of everyone else. In the end, you still need to have the right personality and skills to get accepted.

Good luck.